You weren’t performing for the reviewer.

He’s right. I don’t even think of the reviewers when I’m playing. I only think of them the day after! And I tend to take them to heart.

Ah, we are an insecure bunch. Or at least I am. I shouldn’t speak for the others, and there is only one of me. I am not a we.

Now …
And now it’s on to new things. Today I have English horn reeds to attend to. I should be playing Quiet City on October 26. I write “should” because we haven’t even scheduled rehearsals yet. Finding rehearsal time with a bunch of other musicians who are busy elsewhere can be quite the challenge. I also have a recital on October 28, for which I’ll be playing oboe. On the second recital—a UCSC faculty recital—we’ll be playing wind quartets (oboe, clarinet, horn and bassoon) by Stamitz and Freihofner.

So I have work to do. No time to fret or feel sorry for myself. Gee, what fun is THAT? 🙂