… and it’s not even April 1st.

The Detroit Symphony has announced plans for a completely revamped season, starting with its concerts this week. The programs will not be changed, at least the ones advertised, but the manner in which the works are performed will be altered.

To begin, the orchestra will be seated with their backs to the audience. Music Director Leonard Slatkin said at a press conference yesterday, “I feel that the listeners are distracted by seeing the faces of the musicians. By turning around, people will tire of looking at backsides and focus purely on the music.”

But that is only the beginning of the new era. For the final work on the program, Rachmaninov’s 2nd Symphony, the conductor is not only going to reinstate the cuts sanctioned by the composer, but will add some additional ones as well. All in all the total performing time will be about 12 minutes.

“The piece is so long and repetitive. Once you have heard the main tunes, well, they are so memorable that they do not have to be played again.”



  1. I’ve decided this has GOT to be a joke.

  2. Oh yes … definitely a joke, Jolene. Just cracked me up, thought, that Leonard Slatkin would put this up. Didn’t know he was a funny man. 🙂

  3. oh geez. I didn’t know he was funny either. 😉 It almost seems believable, given the way that things are going these days…