… when he should be giving away oboe reeds.

But what conductor ever gives us oboe reeds, right? (Don’t you think it would be a great idea if they did?)

So here is how the article began:

Stephen P Brown today announced that he will give away closely-held secrets of the music conducting profession to more than 100 radio listeners who may not be regular classical music fans. Why would anyone want to give away secrets for free? “It’s simple,” says Brown, Artistic Director of the Jubilee Orchestra in New York City and now a resident in the Tampa Bay area. “Once people understand that there is much more to music than just the music, they’re going to tell their friends about it. Plus, they can discover how to truly experience live music in ways they may have forgotten or never even experienced before.”

Who knew there were “closely-held secrets”, anyway?