First of all, I have to say I’ve been so very grateful for the responses I’ve received regarding my journey of hearing loss. I linked yesterday’s post to some social media places and I was just so touched by all the comments. So many loving people are in this world!
I don’t plan on writing about this every day — or even every month! — but today I thought I’d mention a bit about how hearing conversations has changed.
When I was younger I was the Best Eavesdropper Ever. In a restaurant I’d be listening to several conversations at once (although we all know that means I wasn’t being as attentive to the one at my own table as I should have been!). Hearing loss changed that. If there is more than one conversation going on my brain sort of shuts down. It’s just too much information, I guess, and it all become a jumbled mess. Restaurants are the worst for this, and there are some restaurants I can no longer go to because they are just too noisy and I want to scream. I must say that the outdoor spots that opened up during Covid have really been quite the blessing for those of us with hearing loss!
At orchestra this past week there were times I couldn’t hear the conductor because there were people nearby chatting while she was talking. Again, my ears just seem to say “forget it!” That is so darn frustrating and if I were the confrontational sort I might have lost it and said something. Instead I just shut down. I don’t like to shut down, but it’s my way of coping. I wish more people in orchestras realized how distracting those conversations can be. It’s true, in fact, that others around me — those with two good ears — were equally frustrated, so it’s not just us hearing impaired folks that are affected. I will never understand why some people will talk when a conductor is giving instructions. Even if the conductor isn’t speaking to them I find the chatting pretty darn rude.
Okay, rant over. Promise!
When Dan and I were on our trip and out walking I’d look over at him and say, “What?”, thinking he had said something. Nope. It was someone to my left instead (we try to always remember Dan needs to be to my right), but because I don’t hear in the left ear my right ear informs me that the speaker must be to the right. It’s kind of crazy making.
Sitting in the English horn chair in the orchestra is quite nice for me since I’m to the left of the oboes … I can hear them! Sitting principal in opera I’ll still hear the principal winds, which is quite important, and I DO hear those to my left, but it’s as if they are coming from my right. Again, crazy making! But I will Make It Work. Period.
Teaching isn’t a problem. One on one is just fine. I hear my students quite well, both when they play and when they speak (well, except the ones who are nearly whispering … I have to work with the shyer ones to get them to speak up!). One on one in any situation is always comfortable, so that’s great.
Oh … and not music related, really, but at church I now sit in a pew on the right side, but I sit at the far left so no one is to my left. That works well. I usually wear my left ear plug because the amplification frequently means I’ll experience distortion. When we sing it can be strange — sometimes I simply can’t hear myself at all. Hm … perhaps that’s a very good thing!
